The world is moving extremely fast and while this is wonderful in some aspects, it can be quite detrimental to the mental health of the people living in it. As the world changes and evolves, people continue to search for ways to define themselves and find out who they are. The problem with this is that external validation is very unstable and basing your sense of self-worth or identity on external factors rarely ever ends well because not much is fixed. There are several ways people tend to define themselves. Here are some of them:
- Personality Tests – There are several personality quizzes online. Popular tests like the Myers-Briggs personality test are accurate to an extent. However, it is quite limiting to tailor your behaviors after a test that is, although quite deep, still a generalization. The other issue with personality tests is that they tend to divide behavioral patterns into positive and negative which can be harmful on most occasions. You are an ever-changing entity. Figuratively and literally because your cells are dividing. This means that you are not the same person you were a year ago. Things are simply not the same.
- Grades – Defining yourself by your grades is very harmful because school doesn’t determine your future and most importantly the system of education was not created to cater to students but rather to produce a mass amount of people with the same skills.
- Physical appearance – Unfortunately, you will probably never be satisfied with your physical appearance. This is not entirely your fault. Social media makes it hard to not compare yourself to others. Regardless, it is important to remember your body is amazing. It works so hard to keep you alive, offer it some words of gratitude. Offer yourself words of gratitude.
- Relationships – It is wrong to demand that people disregard what others think of them however, there should be a limit. Your relationships should never determine how you feel about yourself. It’s dangerous to give that power to someone else.
- Accomplishments – As we grow older we start to place our sense of self-worth in what we have done, the job we have, the places we have been to, the wealth we have accumulated. This is why some people are embarrassed to be seen at their place of work or won’t permit friends to come to visit them at home. This is because you think your accomplishments define you. Yes, they may indicate your decisions whether good or bad but they do not necessarily define you.
Now, what defines you? It is a culmination of several things but most of all, it is your actions. History remembers the actions of people. How you define yourself is more than just your personality, it is how you treat people in lower classes of society. It’s how people remember you because yes people may notice your grades, your partner or your home but they remember your actions.