This book. OMG. So full of angst and emotional longing. So deliciously sexy. Bear with me while I try to write a review that is more than just gushing and love words and emoji hearts and flowers. I’ll try y’all.
Once upon a time the Chandlers and the Kanes were business partners in a successful grocery store chain. Well, not only business partners, but close friends and almost family. Nicholas, the Chandler heir apparent, and Livvy, daughter of Robert and Tani Oka-Kane, fell in love and lust. Their relationship was beautiful and fairy tale like… until the accident that changed everything. Now the Chandlers and the Kanes despise one another. But Livvy and Nicholas can’t let each other go and for one night each year, on Livvy’s birthday, they meet up in a different city and have dirty, sexy, hot hate/love sex. Over the last ten years they’ve met nine times, but this year Livvy didn’t send a text with coordinates. She’s ready to move on and stop hurting herself.
Coming back to her hometown to work and take care of her mother, Livvy knows she’ll have to confront some things she doesn’t want to. Namely, one Nicholas Chandler. But she is determined to reclaim her family and rebuild the relationships she lost after tragedy struck and ripped her world apart. Depression has been part of her life for as long as she can remember, but therapy has helped her learn to cope and understand that she deserves love and respect and compassion. Nicholas, however, is cold and controlling and needs organization and schedules in his life. His one break from his carefully managed existence is his once a year reunion with the woman who still owns him body and soul. Family and the business have always come first, but having Livvy home brings up every painful, beautiful, raw memory of their past and he starts to wonder if they could possibly have a future.
I don’t think I was prepared for just how much this book would affect me. I’ve long been a fan of the second chance trope, simply because of the already deep emotional connection between the main characters and how past feelings and hurts have to be resolved for the them to claim their HEA. From the moment Livvy and Nicholas walked onto the page I was entranced by their chemistry. It’s all at once painful and hopeless, yet full of longing and desperate need. They still have so much love between them and can’t stay away from each other, yet due to their family’s history feel like they can never be together. Every single time they fell into bed I had this ache in my chest knowing that they were going to end up hurting each other. Every sex scene was expertly crafted to show how they use sex to fulfill their needs for one another, not just in sexy, dirty, wicked ways, but on an emotional level. I was glued to the page watching these two work out their past, present, and future. Nicholas stepping outside his carefully protected, ordered life and deciding to finally, finally put the woman he loves first. And Livvy working to repair her relationships and on her own self-care and healing. I loved this couple.
I also loved how well drawn out the secondary characters were. From the cold and detached Tani, to Nicholas’s grandfather John who is still angry at what went down all those years ago and who I believe will be a steady presence in the books to come and will hopefully help these families heal. I adored Livvy’s aunt Maile and her wisdom about depression and the ups and downs of life and inner strength. I’ve read the blurb for the next book and I see that Jackson and Sadia are up next and I am like stupid excited about that. Their book, Wrong to Need You, has a release date of November 28, 2017 and you can bet I’ve already put it on my must read list.
Hate to Want You will defiantely be on my best of list at the end of the year. Highly recommend. Final grade- A
“If someone told you love is rational, they’re a liar. Sometimes you can’t stop loving someone.”